Summer is simple, gorgeous
stifling, humid
summer storms
ceiling fans
rocking out to summer jams
driving in the scorching heat
cruising to a tough bass beat
summer twighlight at 8:30
waking up at midday:30
the summer storms . . . "has sharon closed the windows yet?" of your car, she means, which is parked outside and at the mercy of the clouds. don't you wish you could tap dance like those raindrops do? but really, who doesn't find a bath refreshing? if you're lucky, it might last twenty minutes or more, and from your bedroom windowside, to lounge and watch the white rain cut across the torpid air is most invigorating.
one of the best things about summer: driving. windows down, music loud, no AC, just driving in the heat with a call-in requests radio station in the background playing the same fifteen top 40 songs every two hours
the best thing about summer
is that anything is possible
if you can get your mind around the fact that you aren't expected to do anything at all
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Friday, May 9, 2008
Okay, yes, I'm going to bed, but - haha - this article:
"The torch en route" - IHT.com
http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/05/08/opinion/edcollins.php
"Has anyone else noticed how much the presidential campaign and the Olympics are starting to resemble one another?"
aaaah
P.S.
So maybe I will sleep inside my coat and / wait on your porch til you come back home / oh, right. i can't find a flight / so i check the weather wherever you are, cause i want to know if you can see the stars tonight / might be my only right / we share the sadness, split-screen sadness
"The torch en route" - IHT.com
http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/05/08/opinion/edcollins.php
"Has anyone else noticed how much the presidential campaign and the Olympics are starting to resemble one another?"
aaaah
P.S.
So maybe I will sleep inside my coat and / wait on your porch til you come back home / oh, right. i can't find a flight / so i check the weather wherever you are, cause i want to know if you can see the stars tonight / might be my only right / we share the sadness, split-screen sadness
crises with my packing tape
oh my gosh. so nostalgic about so much right now.
listening to chopin's etude in e. trying to write thank-you notes to my bosses at work. looking at old MS Word files instead . . . ! aaah gosh i will have to post some of these later. letters i've written, poetry, short stories, essays, journals. my writing style's changed a lot (thank goodness - i think i liked it best in middle school before the vocab assignments became overintensive and i thesaurus'd like every other word for a more erudite-sounding synonym), but i've kind of been thinking about the same things for the past seven years. that's not so great! but i'm getting back into writing (evidenced here), so i've got some original stuff coming, i just need to copy some of it over into Word (to be read again in another seven years! eeek).
something else i have saved - the itinerary from my choir trip to europe two summers ago, the summer before college. gosh. GOSH that was two years ago, i
no, not "i barely remember it," i remember it, i look at the pictures and can still sing the songs, i loved the cities and the food, but this itinerary brings it back in a whole other way - it has everything we did, every planned event and hotel where we stayed, restaurant where we ate, every dish we ate (dinners were planned and pre-ordered), all our concert events and the times, oh my gosh, i don't think i ever read this through back on . . . Date Modified: Friday, July 20, 2007, 10:44 P.M. So that was after we got back, about three weeks. I must have saved it off of my email before I deleted all of those "Eurotrip emails." I'm not going to read it through now, either (goodness! travel plans down to the minute! and how far away things were from one another). It's just comforting to know it's here. Even though I forgot about it.
Why'd I just switch into capitalization? Okay.
"Cherish truth, pardon error." VOLTAIRE
I re-read a letter i sent to elaine and at the time i wrote it, i was simultaneously watching "tadpole," which has periodic quotes, just quotes on a black background, because the main character likes to read and is a bit of a scholar.
i like that quote. sums up my year.
gosh. i've changed. i can finally say it! i've . . . learned and grown and so much more this year than last year and i'm willing to admit it. and i've done disreputable, questionable things; found fault in others; lamented faults in myself; but at the end of the day (year), ugh . . . you have to let it go. stupid boys and petty fights and bad communication (lack of communication!), you can't overlook it, but after a certain amount of time, there's nothing to do but drop it and laugh and love and hope for better. and know that tomorrow is another day, and if it was something worthwhile to begin with, you will get another chance. to fix it, to leave it, to make something new . . . and though your views may change and you may abandon some precepts for others, at the heart of things there should be a real heart (uhh redundant? a real . . . effort) to seek out truth and to be true to yourself, your values, God, however uncertain all that may be.
paraphrased, but another quote on truth i discovered while reading "please, mr. einstein" last summer:
"I was asked whether I thought the opposite of truth was a mistake or a lie." "Which did you say?" "If my colleagues are to be believed," Einstein says, "I said, 'The opposite of truth is truth."
listening to chopin's etude in e. trying to write thank-you notes to my bosses at work. looking at old MS Word files instead . . . ! aaah gosh i will have to post some of these later. letters i've written, poetry, short stories, essays, journals. my writing style's changed a lot (thank goodness - i think i liked it best in middle school before the vocab assignments became overintensive and i thesaurus'd like every other word for a more erudite-sounding synonym), but i've kind of been thinking about the same things for the past seven years. that's not so great! but i'm getting back into writing (evidenced here), so i've got some original stuff coming, i just need to copy some of it over into Word (to be read again in another seven years! eeek).
something else i have saved - the itinerary from my choir trip to europe two summers ago, the summer before college. gosh. GOSH that was two years ago, i
no, not "i barely remember it," i remember it, i look at the pictures and can still sing the songs, i loved the cities and the food, but this itinerary brings it back in a whole other way - it has everything we did, every planned event and hotel where we stayed, restaurant where we ate, every dish we ate (dinners were planned and pre-ordered), all our concert events and the times, oh my gosh, i don't think i ever read this through back on . . . Date Modified: Friday, July 20, 2007, 10:44 P.M. So that was after we got back, about three weeks. I must have saved it off of my email before I deleted all of those "Eurotrip emails." I'm not going to read it through now, either (goodness! travel plans down to the minute! and how far away things were from one another). It's just comforting to know it's here. Even though I forgot about it.
Why'd I just switch into capitalization? Okay.
"Cherish truth, pardon error." VOLTAIRE
I re-read a letter i sent to elaine and at the time i wrote it, i was simultaneously watching "tadpole," which has periodic quotes, just quotes on a black background, because the main character likes to read and is a bit of a scholar.
i like that quote. sums up my year.
gosh. i've changed. i can finally say it! i've . . . learned and grown and so much more this year than last year and i'm willing to admit it. and i've done disreputable, questionable things; found fault in others; lamented faults in myself; but at the end of the day (year), ugh . . . you have to let it go. stupid boys and petty fights and bad communication (lack of communication!), you can't overlook it, but after a certain amount of time, there's nothing to do but drop it and laugh and love and hope for better. and know that tomorrow is another day, and if it was something worthwhile to begin with, you will get another chance. to fix it, to leave it, to make something new . . . and though your views may change and you may abandon some precepts for others, at the heart of things there should be a real heart (uhh redundant? a real . . . effort) to seek out truth and to be true to yourself, your values, God, however uncertain all that may be.
paraphrased, but another quote on truth i discovered while reading "please, mr. einstein" last summer:
"I was asked whether I thought the opposite of truth was a mistake or a lie." "Which did you say?" "If my colleagues are to be believed," Einstein says, "I said, 'The opposite of truth is truth."
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
absence note! (where did april go?)
semi-blog kept on my computer - bite-sized journal entries from the past month and a half.
my gosh, where has april gone?
3/19, 10:07a
today and about the same time yesterday: "bagel, peanut butter and jelly!" (today: "plain bagel, peanut butter and jelly!") yesterday at kiva han. today at hunt library.
odd . . .
3/22, 9:51a
I mean, isn't it a sign that humans are inherently paradoxical by the sheer notion of reason? We tend towards explanation and organization and hope to overstep the barriers of disorder when that's where nature says we should go.
4/3, 10:52p
paper plates and plaited paper
what a dapper diningwear cooler
4/9, 11:46p
every word, only once
read it - try it - quickly
(France and the Great War)
(Edit: Haha and I only read three chapters of this book - about half. Obviously the effort I put forth didn't amount to much.)
4/13, 10:41p
too bad, timeless
commonplace
unfortunate
too bad that we're time-less
it can't last forever
we watched it run out
i'm not trying to sound pretentious or premeditated
i'm just frustrated
(sigh)
you can count the beats
we can strike that discord
i will count the time
it can't last forever
we watched it run out
true, true. i could not honestly say it was all you.
true, true.
although you were at fault, you were oblivious
oblivion
how serious.
hilarious
i wish you'd just . . .
can you count the time?
i'm too busy to keep track of the
days, the noons, the hours and the
seconds we're apart
you know, it's better
i think it's better.
you be my timepiece, and i will be here
finally a way out
let's go out tonight
x our different ways, respective
i cannot stand the burden
but maybe it will lift?
or maybe i'm just
counting in the future
where the seconds are uncertain
time draws out in the present
does it realign sometime?
x will you be mine sometime?
you can count the beats
we can strike that discord
i will count the time
it can't last forever
we watched it run out
(EDIT: "x" means possible omission)
- -
two months behind on Vogue
and just behind in general
4/16, 12:27a
and these colored pencils
paint skylines on her browlines
while she contemplates the bylines
over coffee
and the crinoline
how it's crinkled in the background, over rattan chairs, the porch air is so comforting and
spoons. minus tarnish, next to garnish
set politely on the breakfast tray
unfolds her napkin, folds her paper
my, what a lovely day, the sky's so clear
the day's so dapper
what beauty true
i only wish that you were
here.
(EDIT: I posted this one!)
4/16, 1:00a
but you know
proximity has such an advantage
maybe it was almost simultaneous
(EDIT: I can't even remember what I meant by this. I think friend drama back home. I should footnote my entries or write notes to myself.)
4/30, 6:43p
well, i'm willing to be proven wrong
if you'd like to give it a try
i just don't believe in love
i don't believe in trust at first sight
i think i'm waiting to get it right
if you'd maybe like to come along
we can try and err
and with you there
it just might work out, turn out better
it just might turn out better
I hope you noticed my foray into songwriting :) I'm practicing! I have a draft of your song, but it still needs a lot of work and is far from finished. So in the meantime I'm brushing up on my rhymes and humming a lot.
For a while we had the weather to go along with it (humming), all sunshine and spring. Now it's sunshine and chilly. Which doesn't belong in May. (But is perfectly at home in Pittsburgh.)
P.S. I'm 25 days behind on my French phrase-a-day calendar. I never thought I'd be one of those people - you know, you see those rip-a-page-a-day pads on office desks or countertops, and it's a month behind, and you think, gosh, (whoever), You need to get your life together, you don't even have enough time to read a joke a day/learn a phrase a day/process some wise quote a day, what, are you overworked or just lazy?
I'm both. Bah.
"Nous allons devoir emprunter pour pouvoir payer." We'll have to take out a loan to pay for it.
I was curious
my gosh, where has april gone?
3/19, 10:07a
today and about the same time yesterday: "bagel, peanut butter and jelly!" (today: "plain bagel, peanut butter and jelly!") yesterday at kiva han. today at hunt library.
odd . . .
3/22, 9:51a
I mean, isn't it a sign that humans are inherently paradoxical by the sheer notion of reason? We tend towards explanation and organization and hope to overstep the barriers of disorder when that's where nature says we should go.
4/3, 10:52p
paper plates and plaited paper
what a dapper diningwear cooler
4/9, 11:46p
every word, only once
read it - try it - quickly
(France and the Great War)
(Edit: Haha and I only read three chapters of this book - about half. Obviously the effort I put forth didn't amount to much.)
4/13, 10:41p
too bad, timeless
commonplace
unfortunate
too bad that we're time-less
it can't last forever
we watched it run out
i'm not trying to sound pretentious or premeditated
i'm just frustrated
(sigh)
you can count the beats
we can strike that discord
i will count the time
it can't last forever
we watched it run out
true, true. i could not honestly say it was all you.
true, true.
although you were at fault, you were oblivious
oblivion
how serious.
hilarious
i wish you'd just . . .
can you count the time?
i'm too busy to keep track of the
days, the noons, the hours and the
seconds we're apart
you know, it's better
i think it's better.
you be my timepiece, and i will be here
finally a way out
let's go out tonight
x our different ways, respective
i cannot stand the burden
but maybe it will lift?
or maybe i'm just
counting in the future
where the seconds are uncertain
time draws out in the present
does it realign sometime?
x will you be mine sometime?
you can count the beats
we can strike that discord
i will count the time
it can't last forever
we watched it run out
(EDIT: "x" means possible omission)
- -
two months behind on Vogue
and just behind in general
4/16, 12:27a
and these colored pencils
paint skylines on her browlines
while she contemplates the bylines
over coffee
and the crinoline
how it's crinkled in the background, over rattan chairs, the porch air is so comforting and
spoons. minus tarnish, next to garnish
set politely on the breakfast tray
unfolds her napkin, folds her paper
my, what a lovely day, the sky's so clear
the day's so dapper
what beauty true
i only wish that you were
here.
(EDIT: I posted this one!)
4/16, 1:00a
but you know
proximity has such an advantage
maybe it was almost simultaneous
(EDIT: I can't even remember what I meant by this. I think friend drama back home. I should footnote my entries or write notes to myself.)
4/30, 6:43p
well, i'm willing to be proven wrong
if you'd like to give it a try
i just don't believe in love
i don't believe in trust at first sight
i think i'm waiting to get it right
if you'd maybe like to come along
we can try and err
and with you there
it just might work out, turn out better
it just might turn out better
I hope you noticed my foray into songwriting :) I'm practicing! I have a draft of your song, but it still needs a lot of work and is far from finished. So in the meantime I'm brushing up on my rhymes and humming a lot.
For a while we had the weather to go along with it (humming), all sunshine and spring. Now it's sunshine and chilly. Which doesn't belong in May. (But is perfectly at home in Pittsburgh.)
P.S. I'm 25 days behind on my French phrase-a-day calendar. I never thought I'd be one of those people - you know, you see those rip-a-page-a-day pads on office desks or countertops, and it's a month behind, and you think, gosh, (whoever), You need to get your life together, you don't even have enough time to read a joke a day/learn a phrase a day/process some wise quote a day, what, are you overworked or just lazy?
I'm both. Bah.
"Nous allons devoir emprunter pour pouvoir payer." We'll have to take out a loan to pay for it.
I was curious
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
and these colored pencils
paint skylines on her browlines while she contemplates the bylines over coffee
and the crinoline
how it's crinkled in the background, over rattan chairs, the porch air is so comforting and
spoons. minus tarnish, next to garnish
set politely on the breakfast tray
unfolds her napkin, folds her paper
my, what a lovely day, the sky's so clear
the day's so dapper
what beauty true
i only wish that you were
here.
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